Creating Safe Havens: How to Build Safety Plans That Protect Children in Emergencies

When danger strikes—whether it's abuse, domestic violence, or any kind of threat—children need more than hope. They need a plan.

A safety plan is a simple, actionable guide that gives children and families steps to follow when they feel unsafe or are facing an emergency. It’s not about scaring kids—it's about empowering them. When done right, safety planning can save lives, build confidence, and help children respond with clarity in the face of chaos.

Whether you're a parent, caregiver, teacher, or child protection professional, understanding how to create a child-centered safety plan is essential.

What Is a Safety Plan?

A safety plan is a personalized strategy developed to help a child (or family) know what to do, where to go, and who to contact during situations of danger or high stress. This could include:

• Abuse in the home

• Witnessing domestic violence

• Feeling unsafe at school or online

• Being followed or approached by a stranger

• Needing to leave quickly for protection

It should be age-appropriate, practiced regularly, and tailored to the child’s environment and daily routine.

Core Elements of an Effective Child Safety Plan

Here’s the foundation—keep it simple, practical, and accessible.

1. Trusted Safe Adults

Identify 2–3 trusted adults (inside and outside the home) the child can go to or contact when they feel unsafe. These should be people who listen, believe the child, and take action appropriately.

Tip: Make sure these adults know they are part of the plan.

2. Code Words

Create a special, secret code word or phrase the child can use to signal they are in danger or need to leave a situation discreetly. This is especially useful in public or in front of the person causing harm.

3. Safe Places

Talk with your child about where they can go if they need to get away quickly—this could be a neighbor’s house, a friend’s home, a school counselor’s office, or a public space like a library or store.

4. Emergency Contacts

Ensure your child knows how to call 911, understands when it's appropriate to do so, and can identify their home address and phone number. Also, post a list of emergency numbers somewhere easily visible.

5. Exit Strategies

Walk through different “what if” scenarios and help your child understand how to leave dangerous situations safely—whether it’s sneaking out of a room, running to a safe place, or avoiding confrontation.

How to Practice Without Creating Fear

Safety planning isn't about instilling fear—it’s about building confidence.

• Use age-appropriate language. For younger kids, frame safety planning like fire drills: “We practice so we know what to do, just in case.”

• Revisit the plan regularly, especially after changes in routine (new school, new babysitter, etc.).

• Reinforce that it’s never the child’s fault if something unsafe happens.

When to Create a Safety Plan

You don’t have to wait until a crisis is imminent. In fact, the best time to plan is before anything happens.

Safety plans are especially critical when:

• A child has experienced abuse or witnessed violence

• A protective order is in place

• There are custody disputes with potential safety concerns

• Children are showing anxiety about a person or place

• A family is living in a shelter or unstable housing situation

A Safety Plan Is a Lifeline

The goal of a safety plan isn’t perfection. It’s to give a child a sense of agency when everything else feels out of control. Knowing who to call, where to go, and how to signal for help reduces panic and builds resilience.

Every child deserves to know they are not powerless—and that they have a way out, no matter the situation.